Keep it symbol, stupid

Think about a triangle.

For our slower reader, let me just show you one.

Now say out loud what you are thinking about?

Does it have anything AT ALL to do with garments, cleaning or laundry? I didn’t think so… yet, there it is on the tags on all my clothes.

The only role a triangle should have on any garment is to be jauntily juxtaposed with a few other geometric shapes on a Bill Cosby sweater or a Stefan Edberg tennis shirt – both of which should never have left the 80s.

Most times the triangle has a little cross through it, like this.

What, intuitively, is this supposed to mean in the context of laundry? My best guess… “don’t eat Doritos while wearing this shirt. Those orange stains never come out.”

How about this one? That could be representing a tumble dryer, but also looks just like my washing machine! So which DON’T I do? Then again, maybe it’s just reminding us of the incompatability of square pegs and round holes?

And this? “Do not throw these pants down a well”? Something about rings…? As in “do not get married in this shirt”?

They only get weirder….

“Wash only while listening to ‘Dark Side of the Moon'”?

“The truth is out there?” “Compatible with European electrical sockets?” “You have a nose like a pig?”

I swear it’s a conspiracy by dry cleaners and laundry services to confuse us so much we pay them to do it! And they have the hide to give us those “We ‘heart’ our customers” signs on their coat hangers.

What is the world coming to, when even coat hangers can’t be trusted?

— Irish


One Response to “Keep it symbol, stupid”

  1. clightnirish Says:

    “Wash only while listening to ‘Dark Side of the Moon'”…. Pure genius.
    – Clight

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