Orca Conspiracy

US law enforcement are seriously letting us down, and have been for several years. They fail to protect us from a serious threat: The rampant crime wave perpetrated by the captive killer whale population.

A recent example is highlighted here: Killer Whale Kills.

What’s most worrisome is that the same orca was involved in numerous previous incidents. For example, one morning, the trainers came in to find this orca in the pool, cool as you please, with a dead human body on her back. The official explanation was hypothermia (Sure it was, and the orca was just trying to keep him warm with body heat, no doubt.)

Evil Orca

You will rue the day you taunted me with a herring, human!

The same orca was linked to other suspicious deaths, yet police have consistently ignored the evidence. They have not once, to my knowledge, interviewed the orca in relation to these incidents.  It’s obvious their priorities are out of whack – they put Cat Stevens on the no-fly list (he wrote “Peace Train” for god’s sake!), yet they blatantly ignore a murderer whose first name is “Killer”? This is no ordinary Killer Whale, this is a serial Killer Whale.

Rumours of an orca conspiracy have been floated for years now. It’s believed that the reclusive “Don Shamu” of San Diego and his sons Namu and Willy are the masterminds behind the killer whale crime wave against humans.  Willy, who orchestrated a sophisticated psychological intelligence operation against a young human in the Pacific Northwest in the 1990s, managed to escape and is currently at large. Experts have speculated that he is behind the

Shark Slapper

Unknown orca bitch-slaps a shark in the South Pacific.

increasing number of orca attacks on sharks in the wild, moving from pod to pod and training them in deadly new techniques developed by his father when he worked at Sea World. Evidence is surfacing that the attacks on sharks are only a power play to remove sharks as a predator. This would leave orcas free to change their primary food source from fish and seals to surfers, aquarium attendants and the occasional German tourist.


2 Responses to “Orca Conspiracy”

  1. Avelaine Says:

    I honestly can’t tell if this is serious or satire. Either way you need to get your facts straight before spewing. Tilly was one of THREE whales involved in the initial death (THAT DID NOT HAPPEN AT SEAWORLD but rather a park when the animals werent treated well). The second death in which the man was found on his back … the man SNUCK INTO THE PARK AFTER HOURS AND ENTERED the whale tank (again NOT at seaworld at another park). I want to see someone enter your home in the middle of the night that you dont know and dont know his intentions. You might just kill him too.

    • clightnirish Says:

      Avelaine, serious or satire, you decide… Satire is serious business. But with regard to the facts, we did not state that the previous incidents happened at Sea World. Further, the fact that Tilly initially ran with the infamous “South Central Sealand Gang” of British Columbia doesn’t change the facts. Shamu, however, was one of Sea World’s most famous employees. The self defense argument for the “Sleeps with the Orcas” incident (as it was dubbed by commentators) may work, but the fact is Tilly was caught red handed, with motive, means and opportunity. We have yet to see a statement by either Tilly or his attorney denying any of this.

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